Make America Gove, Amen

Those of a pious disposition may recall the jabbering homunculus Michael Gove commemorating the anniversary of the King James Bible by inflicting autographed copies on schoolchildren. No master should be too proud to learn from his acolyte, and the Trumpster has taken scarcely more than a decade to super-vulgarise the Gove inspiration into something appropriately meta-Murcan. An edition called the God Bless the USA Bible, as hawked by a country singer who provides Horst Wessel services at Trumpster triumphs, now carries the tangerine theologian's endorsement alongside its price tag of $59.99. To outcrass Michael Gove is no small achievement, and were it not for the unfair advantage of an inside cranium copiously besplattered with the diarrhoeic excretions of his hydrophobic head-tribble, it might have proved a challenge even for the Trumpster.