Criminals for Better Law Enforcement

Among the fundamental doctrines of the national religion is that where private enterprise falls short, bureaucratic Big Government is to blame; and so it has proven in the case of Britain's plucky little moisture provision profiteers. One of the past few weeks' various Environment Secretaries, Ranil Jayawardena, ordered the company CEOs to provide him with plans to reduce sewage dumping, and the response was rather less constructive than the salaries might imply. The water companies complained about the Government's libertarian attitude towards a 2010 law on drainage systems for new developments, and its refusal to enforce a ban on non-biodegradable wet wipes, which are a significant contributor to the formation of those fatberg species that forsake the House of Expenses Claimants in favour of sewers merely physical. The CEO of Thames Water, one of the worst offenders at wasting water through badly maintained pipes, came dangerously close to suggesting that lecturing the little people about turning off their taps might not prove a sufficient solution. Indeed, so altogether righteous was the water companies' anger that there was barely a trace of sensible and moderate hints about how Ranil Jayawardena or his successors might benefit financially.