Journal of the Plague Year

continued, by a Gentleman

Were it not for the unrivalled Conſtancy of our Prime Miniſter's Character, the implacable Firmneſs and Forwardneſs of his Paunch, the determined Sway of his Dewlaps and the pearleſcent porphyrous Gleam of his induſtrious perſpiring Countenance, I might fear me that this greateſt of Leaders had been ſuborned by ſome beaſtlie foreign Power intent upon ſapping our moral Fibre. For it muſt ſurely be a moſt ill-adviſed Conception, to force upon our free and plucky Nation ſuch a monſtrous Impoſition as the Wearing of Maſques in publick, whether the Breath be ſweet or foul and the Teeth black or white, and even to levy Fines upon thoſe with ſufficient Steadfaſtneſs of Patriotick Principle to defy the Law of England in the Name of perſonal Convenience. At the Bloater and Blueſtocking Coffee-houſe this eve Sir Deſmond Swyne was incandeſcent with righteous Diſcombobulation at this new Aſsault upon the Liberty of his Jowls, and ſeverall brave Gentlemen were moved to ſubſcribe to a freſh conſtituted Bare-faced Defiants Clubbe. I did not join my Self, pleading Lack of ready Means owing to the late Rebelliouſneſs among the Negroes, but noted their Names in caſe it ſhould benefit my continuing Correſpondence offering my Services as a Miniſter in charge of domeſtick Intelligence.