Journal of the Plague Year

continued, by a Gentleman

Her Majeſty's most loyal and undiſputed Government, that Delight of the Virtuous, that Rewarder of Patriotiſm, that Liberator of the Seas, Champion of Commerce, Breeder of Heroes and ſporting Chaſtiſer of the ravening migrant Horde, hath merited the Favour of Heaven and the Gratitude of a redeemed Population by reſtoring to our worſhipful Realm her eternal Privilege of Freedom. Although a few Details remain to be conſidered, ſuch as the Dates and Conditions of the Implementation and ſuchlike Scrivener's Fodder, our noble Prime Miniſter hath ſtated upon the Honour of his luminous unblotted Eſcutcheon that the Nation's full Birth-right will almoſt certainly be reſtored during ſome future Period in accordance with the Demands of Piety, the Computations of Expedience and the irreſiſtible Compulſions of political Inſpiration and perſonal Convenience. Our taking of the Blows of Fate upon the Chin of National Unity hath borne Fruit, in that many of the more expendable Juveniles have returned to their Labours, for I hear tell that Chimneys are being ſwept again in certain Boroughs, although my Lord Splyce-Chyldebryde continues to complain that he ſtill cannot find a living Whore beneath the Age of ſixteen Years and muſt continue to ſlake his Appetites upon chilled Meat at the Prince's Aſylum for Foundlings. There is Speculation alſo that the abſurd and inconvenient Rules of Diſtance may ſoon be relaxed, to the ineffable Improvement of all ſocial Intercourſe and the Greening of our luſty Britiſh Phlegm.