Burning for Learning

During the grand Dickensian days of the great British boarding school, those who collected the fees put out the idea that heated classrooms and proper feeding would induce lazy repletion in the pupils, whereas cold and hunger would aid their concentration and harden them up nicely for a lifetime of service helping to civilise the fuzzy-wuzzies. In the unlikely event that the tech-bros and corporations who run His Majesty's Government have any interest in retaining an educated workforce, a corresponding myth may soon be required for the present academic climate. Since the effects of global heating have been known for a matter of mere decades, it is natural that most of the country's schools should still be adapted for the weather of yesteryear and therefore currently approaching the conditions of a Texas penitentiary; especially as schools tend to be staffed by teachers, a calling for which successive governments have manifested a degree of casual contempt equalled only by their attitude towards NHS medical personnel, unpaid carers, and refugees. Nevertheless, it would hardly be true to say that nothing is being done. In keeping with the great British tradition of the emergency response, His Majesty's Government was advised as early as two months ago that schools should be fitted with air conditioning in the next quarter-century or so.