It's an Easy Mistake to Make

Although numerous members of our Mother of Parliaments have been at a loose end since July, there is apparently no truth to the plausible rumours that they had all toddled off to Newfoundland. Contrary to first impressions and despite their rubbery consistency, their lack of sense organs and their obvious intellectual advantages, the white doughy blobs and pale gooey masses crowding the Canadian province's beaches are not ejectees from Westminster's House of Expenses Claimants. Regrettably, this also applies to the majority of doughy blobs and gooey masses which are presumably at rest on the ocean floor; which may lead to some unfortunate nutritional consequences for the higher life forms. Hard as it is to distinguish well-fattened British public servants from globs of industrial waste, it is arguably even harder to distinguish them from fish food.