You Can Lead a Right-Wing Horticulture, But...

Somehow or other, despite His Majesty's Government having cut off British farmers' subsidies from the Strasbrussels bureaucrats and put nothing in their place, and despite all that has been done to erode the soil and poison the water, Britain's food security appears to have been disimproved. Who could possibly have predicted it? Fortunately, His Majesty's Government has proclaimed its usual unwavering support and promised to accompany the farming sector on every step of its decline, from which a minister or two and their chums are doubtless set to profit. In the meantime, while something called Steve made disapproving noises, something else called Steve ejaculated a bit of rah-rah about our new, vigorous life inside cutting-edge glasshouses and turbocharging our fruit and vegetable sector beyond the appointment of various specimens to successive Cabinets.