Treason of the Grocers

Despite the benefits of the Japanese Marmite trade and the incalculable advantages of exchanging the beastly Euro-wog market for some whelk stalls in the South Pacific, certain elements of the food industry continue to align themselves with the woke metropolitan Islamist hard-left élite. The Elizabeth the Great Accords brought in to keep Northern Ireland in the civilised world provide for meat and dairy products to be labelled Not for EU when sent from Great Britain to be sold in the absolutely-not-a-colony. This is to prevent sellers bypassing inferior EU quality controls and thus inflicting superior foodstuffs on people too foreign to appreciate them. However, at the insistence of the Conservatives' chums in the Democratic Unionist Party, from October the labelling will apply to all meat and dairy products sold in the UK, and from July 2025 to fruit and vegetables as well, ministers of the Crown presumably exempted. Wilfully unmindful of the benefits to the British consumer, an unpalatable cabal of producers, manufacturers and retailers is protesting about the extra costs, and has even threatened to involve those well-known enemies of the people in the courts should there fail to be, of all things, sensible alternatives.