Diplomat Dave

Britain's glistening pink Minister for Wogs, Huns and Hottentots, whose statesmanship contributed so much to putting Britain and Libya where they are today, is to take on the mantle of Head Boy for the civilised world and give a minister of the Righteous State a bit of a talking-to on behalf of the World Cop. The beneficiary of this moral uplift will be a political enemy of the Netanyahoo who has taken it upon himself to go absent without official leave in Washington and London. Although Lord Cameron of Piggywick showed little enough interest in preventing conflict, starvation or disease when commencing his party's decade and a half of poor-bashing, cripple-kicking and race-baiting on the mainland, the situation in Gaza has apparently become a bit dreadful nowadays. Indeed, if unelected civil servants were to advise that the Righteous State is in breach of international law, the master race might be forced to interfere with the free market in weapons exports; so clearly the consequences of the Israeli rampage are beginning to verge upon the inconvenient. Nevertheless, even the more saintly factions of the Righteous State remain reluctant to accept a ceasefire in return for the mere resumption of the bantustan solution condoned by Western values; and it is as yet unclear whether the seismic wobbling of his Lordship's moral fibre will prove sufficient to persuade them otherwise.