British News for British Readers

Faced with the possibility that certain dusky foreigns are prepared to pay good money for the Maily Toryguff, His Majesty's Government has had a sudden attack of market interventionism. It's one thing to flog off public assets to private companies based outside the UK; it is quite another to allow a traditionally Conservative and now dementedly far-right rag to fall into the hands of a bunch of greasy wogs, however forthright and pragmatic their attitude to human rights. The Toryguff is in imminent peril of being taken over by an unholy hybrid of private investment and foreign government; which would clearly darken its British values far beneath those of the London Evening Tory with its KGB family standards, let alone those of that free and fearless majority of our national Press controlled by the Australo-American paragon whose supreme leadership encompasses alike the Government, the Opposition, and the Plebs.