Thoughts That Count

The recent death of an Albanian immigrant aboard the Home Office's prison hulk continues to inspire ever greater heights of Britishness. The Ministry for Wog Warehousing, which will go to any expense to deport people while they are still alive, has developed a hitherto latent streak of parsimony now that the unfortunate man is dead. Although shipping a body to Albania costs the taxpayer somewhat less than transporting live refugees to Rwanda, there is no room in the Ministry's conscience, let alone its budget, for a contribution to the expenses of the bereaved. Instead, the Ministry extruded a spokesbeing to convey some thoughts for those affected to bask in, as a salutary counterpoint to the boorish materialistic urges which led the family to set up a crowdfunder and, worse yet, demand a full inquiry.