World Beeting

Once more the pure sewage of British independence is being polluted by the waters of woke, which are now dampening the resolve of business leaders. A group of bee-hugging business types are demanding that the Government follow, of all things, scientific advice from experts in the matter of neonicotinoid pesticides, which the jabbering homunculus Michael Gove promised would be banned in the wake of victory over the Strasbrussels tyranny. Rather than simply breaking the promise, as would undoubtedly be done by the clean-limbed cadres of Team Starmer, the Government has sneaked around it by sanctioning one warship-monickered nicotinoid for "emergency use" each year since casting off the Euro-wog yoke. Having killed the aphids which threaten to reduce profit margins from sugar beet, the pesticide spreads to the soil and thence to the wildflowers which the bees pollinate. Such behaviour, of course, constitutes a blatant blasphemy against the free-market principles of competition and self-reliance, and the bees are justly and poetically punished for socialistically depriving the wildflowers of the opportunity to pollinate themselves.