Better Banking for Fiscal Freedom

Good may yet come of evil in the distressing case featuring the strutting Caudillo emeritus of the Farage Falange and his cancellation by minions of the woke remainer establishment. The great man's account at Coutts was closed because there wasn't enough money in it, and insult was added to injury with the offer of an ordinary person's account at NatWest. Internal documents then emerged alleging that His Exalted Britishness held, of all things, "xenophobic, chauvinistic and racist views" which were incompatible with the values of the financial sector. Ready as ever to accommodate itself upon the instant to the Dear Leader's whimsies and whinges, the Treasury proposes to compel banks to spell out the reasons why they are closing an account, thereby creating a fairer playing field for fraudsters, money launderers and other potential Conservative donors. The relevant legislation is unlikely to see the back of a Government envelope until the House of Expenses Claimants returns from its two-month holiday; but Fishy Rishi and Chancellor Chunt will no doubt be eager to expedite the matter, thanks to their usual overriding concern with free speech, financial probity and sheer disinterested benevolence.