Owning Glendower

The British Empire's oldest possession, whose status as a constituent country was so genocidally come by that it doesn't even have a symbol on the national flag, has reacted more or less grumpily to the investiture of its new national royal. The title Prince of Wales was first conferred by Edward I upon his son, the soon-to-be-disastrous Edward II, after a typically Christian colonial war featuring incendiary restructuring of peasant holiday homes and subsequent ethnic cleansing of Welsh tenants to make way for worthier ones. Now that the latest placeholder has formally undergone his Ruritanian transmogrification, certain mischievous elements are agitating for him to learn the Welsh language: a move with all the surreal Britishness of some woke National Johnson quoting Kipling in Hindustani.