Cultural Detritus

British decency continues to triumph in Afghanistan, with about a hundred and eighty contractors for the British Council left to the mercies of the Taliban when the best armed forces in the world accomplished their glorious evacuation. Although Her Majesty's Government found time and resources to rescue a couple of hundred cats and dogs, the British Council tends to concern itself with education and openly admits to teaching values of diversity and openness. None of this would much endear an organisation to Her Majesty's Government even if its contractors did not also happen to be potential refugees; and the Ministry for Wog Control duly insisted that the contractors would have to apply online for permission to enter the UK. Despite the labour shortage, Britain remains too full up to take more than a couple of thousand more wogs, so the contractors' families will have to fight it out among themselves as to who gets to come along. After mere months of campaigning by a former colleague, the Ministry for Wogs, Beads and Trinkets later "appeared to suggest" that formal applications would in fact not be necessary; but Her Majesty's Government has naturally not deigned to concern itself with such crass worldly questions as how the refugees' transit to civilisation, liberty and a possible Rwandan package holiday is to be accomplished. It is to be hoped that their time with the British Council has equipped the refugees to register the subtleties of the master race's moral position.