Cancelled

Although Her Majesty's Government's rah-and-blah in favour of conversion therapy for the filthy transwhatsits has not suffered the ignominy of having Alok Sharma appointed master of ceremonies, widespread defections by unconstructive woke types have brought about an equally unimpressive result. Even some Conservatives are beginning to wonder if the National Johnson might have been a bit indiscreet when he promised to ban conversion and then announced that actually he was all bullied up for a bit of good old-fashioned queer-bashing - and so soon after joining Vatican Incorporated, too. In accordance with the now standard policy of extremist bluster followed by tactical row-back, Johnson later levelled the queer-bashing down to trans-bashing, just in time for one of his own backbenchers to come out as the country's first openly transgender MP. Finally the Government's own adviser for profitable noncisness, who apparently had more important things to do before taking the job than glance over his employer's CV, resigned in shock and declared his trust eroded when he discovered that the National Johnson, of all people, had somehow said the thing that was not. Even the tokenism isn't what it used to be.