You Can't Trust Anything These Days

With plebs eaten up by disease,
Let's out on the lawn at our ease:
The day is so fine,
Let's guzzle some wine
While scoffing a nice bit of cheese!

O horror and fury! What dogs,
What fiends are those vile Euro-wogs!
That damnable cheese
We thought Japanese -
Was made by perfidious Frogs!

What is this bouquet in my conk?
A hanky, I pray! I must honk!
The scandal that's brewing
Could prove our undoing:
This is an Australian plonk!

Marnus Barnier