Saving Tiny Texans

Just because an American happens to be the size of an orange with eyes sealed shut and no brain or heart to speak of, that doesn't mean it can't be a loyal citizen and a virtuous business opportunity. The Christian state of Texas is upping its campaign for the coathanger industry with a radical expansion of the right to sue, which will enable anyone with a dislike of women's rights to mount a legal challenge against individual abortion providers. Small towns across Texas and Nebraska have already adopted similar measures, touting themselves as "sanctuary cities" for cell globules, meat tadpoles and other potential Republicans; but the new state law would impose a ten-thousand-dollar penalty plus legal fees, with no corresponding rights for defendants. Just because a state isn't one of those Islamo-Communist dictatorships like North Korea, Iran or California, that doesn't mean ordinary folks can't do their part as spies, denouncers and witch-hunters.