Kindly Leave This Toilet As You Found It

Our civilising mission in Afghanistan has reached new heights of accomplishment with the attack on Kabul airport, which has the potential to serve both as a salutary warning to asylum-seeking stereo-nationals and as a pretext for future nation-building. The perpetrators were apparently from Islamic State, that charming organisation whose emergence is among the main achievements of our twenty-year crusade; and the collateral damage was very nearly worthy of a successful drone-bombing.