Despite Extensive Coverage

Even after nearly a year of shrieking infotainment from sensible and moderate right-wing media properties, much of Britain's adult population remains confused or baffled by pestilential jargon. More than forty per cent have trouble with words like epidemologist and antibody, and about eighty per cent would have difficulty explaining a polymerase chain reaction test, despite the journalistic community's titanic educational efforts. Fotunately, the pedagogical press has not striven entirely in vain. Comprehension improves significantly when applied to terms which are political and meaningless rather than defined and scientific, with a mere thirty per cent of free British subjects failing to realise how the police-state slogan stay alert might apply in a medical emergency.