Tsunamis That Glow in the Dark

Since many of the world's poorer countries will be first to suffer the less convenient effects of the anthropogenic extinction event, it is only natural that their people should be induced to throw more resources at western capitalists. Rather than deriving their energy from anything as dirty, dangerous and scarce as wind, wave or solar power, developing nations must be initiated into the clean, safe, blanched-pachydermic wonders of sustainable uranium, which a Danish company now claims (or "believes" according to the Guardian's resident psychic) that it can provide as a viable alternative. A small nuclear reactor, or perhaps several, could be placed on board a ship by expendable South Korean workers at a very safe distance from the Skagerrak and the Kattegat, and the whole safe contraption towed to the Philippines, or somewhere with equally rigorous safety standards. Power could then be supplied during the next quarter-century of increasingly violent weather, with the possibility of catastrophic leakage from the advanced reactor being minimised nearly as far as may be permitted by circumstances and the necessity for corporate solvency and commensurate boardroom incentives.