Fatherly Chastisement

Although the state of Florida dutifully donated its electors to the Trumpster and his hydrophobic head-tribble, in obedience to the braying and squealing of the patriotic Lurve-pushers and Jesus-mongers, it seems the vote was not quite decisive enough to appease that grand old party in the sky. In accordance with His notoriously arbitrary mercy, the wrath of God has descended upon the region, destroying and disrupting lives in Florida and causing numerous casualties among the sinister superpowers of Central America. Speaking from a prudent distance, in the miraculously hurricane-proof city-state which specialises in converting tithes from the poor into legal fees for rapists, the Lord's elected representative made the usual public appeal for God to mitigate the effects of His own improving work. Doubtless the results from the grovelling will be as detectable as ever.