Notwithstanding Godwin

It would of course be wrong and unfair to compare Adolf Hitler with Boris Johnson, not least because Johnson has twice as many testicles and Hitler had considerably more physical courage and was far less lazy. Nevertheless, Churchill's great contemporary and his tiny little groupie do have points in common, including silly hair, a penchant for racism and a touchingly starry-eyed relationship with the sound of their own voices. As has recently become clear even to one or two free and fearless journalists, they also share a certain insouciance on the subject of international treaty obligations; and it was doubtless this particular elective affinity which prompted the beastly Huns to begin preparations for the ticklish business of living encircled by the rogue states of Russia in the east and the United Kingdom somewhere in orbit around Planet Westminster. Typically for so methodical and humourless a race, the German government made efforts to inform schools, care centres and even asylum-seeker shelters in advance, rather than relying on G4S and the Blitz spirit to see the country through.