Callous

The mayor of Calais has recommended that the Cummings administration calm down, which under present circumstances appears nearly as realistic as recommending the Ninety-five Theses to Bloody Mary. Beset by its own incompetence on all sides, from the inconvenience of holidaymakers to the comparatively minor matter of our world-beating Covid-19 death toll, Her Majesty's Government has little other choice, if it wishes to retain the approval of the great British public, than to point and squeal about the beastly Euro-wogs who are not doing enough to protect our global might from the swarming migrant hordes. The mayor of Calais even registered some concern over the request by the Ministry for Wog Control for the Royal Navy to send out a few aircraft carriers and show the rubber dinghies the true meaning of British fair play. Calais, which was a British possession as recently as 1558, is evidently haunted by folk memories of the good old days when England was ruled by a hysterical absolutist with a no-nonsense attitude to dissent and a liking for bonfires of the expendable.