BP Never Shall Be Slaves

Subversive and un-British doings are afoot at the British Petroleum Museum, where someone with a funny foreign name has got himself up as a director. A bust of the museum's founder, whose wealth derived partly from slave labour in the West Indies, has been removed from its pedestal and placed in, of all things, some sort of context. It is unlikely that even this traitorous de-rahrahfication of our glorious island story will be enough for the insatiable warriors of woke, who continue to demand the deportation of liberated artefacts to an uncertain future in Africa. Nevertheless, with fitting entrepreneurial Britishness, the museum has so far condescended to enter negotiations with Benin on the possibility of loaning Nigerians back some of their heritage.