Journal of the Plague Year

continued, by a Gentleman

Having been enforced theſe paſt Months to a ſedentary Life, I found it neceſsary this Fore-noon to apply to my Taylor for further Repairs to my ſecond-beſt Guſset, which ſplit in moſt unſeemly and diſcomfiting Faſhion through the lower Eſcutcheon. The Shoppe was well filled with Cuſtomers taking their final Gaſp of freſh Air before the threatened Impoſition of the Maſque by our deſpotick Government and in deſpite of all ſtrenuous Effort by our noble Prime Miniſter. There was much healthy and democratick Debate as to whether or no the uppity Negroes ſhould be tarred and feathered in addition to the ſtatutory Chaſtiſements, and the Taylor complained of the late Shortage in Cotton, at the very Time when ſo many prominent Gentlemen have ſo far expanded their Subſtance as to require Stripping and Greaſing with beſt Quality Lard before they can get through the Door. It ſeemeth to me none the leſs, that the Wretch in Hopes of further Fees, hath contrived to leave inſufficient Trouſer-ſpace for the proudly uncircumciſed Member of a ſaved Congregation.