Schaden in Frieden

Though loyal citizens of the Recrudescent Imperium would hardly know it, particularly in the very week of the D-Day anniversary rah-rah, there have been one or two years in history when Britain and Germany were not at war. One such year was 1878, when a German ironclad battleship sank in the Channel after an accidental collision, with the loss of nearly three hundred lives. The wreck has been listed as a heritage site, prompting a perfunctory admission from the local functionary of the Parliamentary Brexit Party that Britain and Germany have indeed undergone one or two inglorious periods when God has neglected to match us with His hour. The fatal collision occurred because the Germans encountered some sailing ships and manoeuvred to get out of their way, and the idea of highly modern and robust Europeans being sunk by their consideration for the slow, fragile and antiquated must hold a certain comic resonance for any present-day British patriot.