Too Exalted a Role Model

Although Brazil's own Boris Johnson has made heroic efforts to overcome his racial handicap and inject a goodly clyster of British spirit into his nation's adoring populace, it appears he has been less than fortunate in his choice of health minister. Like the People's Haystack, Bolsonaro is facing unpatriotic dissent from mere experts, with his contribution to medical science, impressively labelled vertical isolation, being pithily dismissed as "like a swimming pool with four people in it - and only two of those people are allowed to urinate." Nevertheless, by contrast to our own Secretary of State for Profitable Healthcare, Bolsonaro's health minister has publicly criticised the fertile Johnsonian free-for-all brought on by his leader's posturing, and has even gone so far as to contradict the great man's statement that the virus "appears to be going away." Patriotic Britons will rejoice that no such behaviour can be expected from Johnson's junior representative for Dyson Limited, whose limpetlike attachment to the Führerprinzip has covered him so liberally with British blood and soil.