The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Tuesday, March 24, 2020

Spread the Britishness

In the midst of any crisis, life's little continuities are always a comfort; and Transport for London has been commendably prompt in providing the city with a textbook triumph of British planning. Mildly concerned that the herd immunity thingy had not produced the anticipated foreigner-flooring results, Her Majesty's Government later advised, or commanded, or recommended, or in certain moods simply muttered, that under one or two circumstances, with exceptions, and taking into account the needs of the business community, certain non-essential plebs might perhaps consider not going to work, unless they really felt like it. The Secretary of State for Protfitable Healthcare was so concerned for the welfare of essential citizens that he placed an announcement behind a paywall in the Barclaygraph, hopefully to the fiscal improvement of all concerned. Transport for London mucked in by closing some stations and limiting services, whereupon those trains still running became packed with commuters whose regard for social distance was sadly scant compared with their lust for filthy lucre. Naturally, Her Majesty's Government has made no financial provision for the many workers whose jobs have been efficientised out of all security and all opportunity to build up any savings; it appears that, despite a decade of hints, such people still refuse to starve away quietly and cleanly. Adding to the problem was the attitude of NHS staff, who have suddenly metamorphosed into essential workers after ten years as parasites, idlers and weekend murderers, but who really should have known better than to travel on crowded underground trains instead of using chauffeured limousines the way responsible people do.

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