Outrage Upon Outrage

We are used to the lesser breeds' inability to remember who won the World Wars; but who could have imagined anyone forgetting the War of the Spanish Succession? Britain's victory in that noble conflict, without even American help, would have placed a Habsburg prince on the Spanish throne had not the British betrayed his candidacy at the last minute, possibly on the grounds that his anti-Gypsy policies were as yet insufficiently genocidal. In the confusion Britain filched a big stone with monkeys on it, some of whose descendants are now embroiled in a bizarre conspiracy to make themselves slightly foreign. Gibraltar, which voted against the British people in 2016, is exacerbating its guilt with crypto-Iberian noises about joining the Schengen area. Should the treacherous plot succeed, visiting Britons would have to defile themselves applying for visas and paying fees, for all the world as if they were immigrants trying to stay in their own British homes. It is to be hoped that Her Majesty's Government's fellow far-rightists in Vienna will remember their nation's historic debt of honour, should Britain now be minded to seek back-up from the Austrian navy.