Shattering Targets From Behind

One of the most important reasons for leaving the EU is, of course, to free ourselves from the Brusso-Strasbourg Nazi-Soviet diktats which prevent the Conservative Party being as radical and ambitious as it would like in cleaning up the environment. This no doubt explains why an investigation by Greenpeace and the tree-hugging hippies of the Financial Times has found that the Imperial Haystack's promise to "do extraordinary things on the environment" is being fulfilled in much the same radical manner as when he presided over the poisoning of London. It appears that the Bullingdon Club's promise to deliver the greenest government ever has been at least as spectacular a success as the late Head Boy's pledges to detoxify the Conservative Party and stop it banging on about Europe. By way of compensation, a huge United Nations rah-and-blah is scheduled to be held next year, at which point Her Majesty's Government will be on schedule to fail its legal obligations over air quality, biodiversity, tree planting, recycling and river quality.