Reasonable Reform Within the Bounds of Pious Moderation

Every moderate centrist's favourite Islamic fundamentalists have yet to let up on their sensibly reforming quest for British values. Since the demise of Jamal Khashoggi for being insufficiently free and cantankerous, the head-chopping House of Saud has responded to international criticism by increasing its repression of the enemy within, which at this point seems to be women. Much like a buccaneering British government pluckily conferring rights on Euro-wog citizens, the head-chopping House of Saud is concerned to ensure that the beneficiaries of its generosity don't get above their station and start demanding more than the boys are inclined to give. The head-chopping House of Saud has even adapted the good old Christian practice of selling indulgences, offering to release detainees in return for a democratising financial consideration: a flourish which has the Reverend Blair's sticky little fingerprints all over it, and may well signal an entirely new phase in this exhilaratingly moderate moral saga.