The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Saturday, October 26, 2019

Money Isn't Everything

Although for most of us the benefits of Brexit will be purely patriotic, Britain's approaching independence from the Euro-wog yoke does have one or two fiscal implications as well. Aside from our liberating ability to trade with countries with which we are already trading, the instability of sterling helps various gamblers to keep the wolf from the door and the uncertainty of the date enables the Royal Mint to produce post-truth commemorative coins. Since the compliant Sajid Javid has decided to take a bit of a holiday from all that tedious budgeteering, he will have all the more time for deciding what to do with the hoard proclaiming the Recrudescent Imperium's liberation on 31 October and friendship with all nations except uppity Irish, Empire-hating piccaninnies and the Nazi-Soviet serfs of Brussels and Strasbourg. One possibility is to melt the coins down and mint them anew with the date of the next cliff-edge; another is to flog them off as curiosities at sixteen hundred times their face value, presumably on the grounds that it's a rare coin indeed which can manage to be as inaccurate and over-priced as Her Majesty's Government.

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