Hancock's Patented Clarificatory Dispensation

Well, here's a thing: it appears that the minister in charge of privatising the National Health Service may have said the thing that is not regarding the ongoing privatisation of the National Health Service. Under rules introduced by the Bullingdon Club and their little orange fags, all contracts in excess of £615,278 have to be put to tender; it is believed that the Conservatives wanted a round figure in order to keep things simple enough for the chancellor, but the Liberal Democrats exerted their usual transformative influence and insisted on the 8 at the end. The present minister for privatisation has blustered about being clearer than his predecessors (which arguably demonstrates rather a lack of ambition given that his predecessors were the hapless Murdoch flunkey Jeremy C Hunt and the failed Turkey Twizzler salesman Andrew Lansley) and blathered about there being no privatisation of the NHS on his watch. Since the minister made these statements, as one might expect, the NHS has invited private companies to bid for a total of nineteen contracts. Asked to comment on the apparent discrepancy, the minister extruded a spokesbeing to issue the usual clarification of the previous clarity: apparently the Tumbledown Tessie administration, which these days can barely hold the same line for two sentences running, has a Long Term Plan thingy which involves asking the NHS what can be done to remove unnecessary bureaucracy now that the medical staff have been largely weeded out, subject of course to the clarities of the religious orthodoxy which clearly forbids any injection of public money for the maintenance of merely public services.