The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Thursday, April 25, 2019

Fata Murcana

The rise of the Trumpster, and of the hydrophobic orange head-tribble which defecates its philosophy into his cranial vacancy, has prompted new and interesting precautions in the world's greatest military. Not only has the perpetual war against the English language been upped another defcon, with unidentified flying objects undergoing a nomenclatural reclassificatory procedure and emerging as "unexplained aerial phenomena," but the navy brass are concerned that pilots who encounter the said phenomena feel too embarrassed to report them. There are now more sightings than ever before, presumably owing either to the head-tribble's galactic machinations or to the usual fiendish conspiracies involving Russia, Venezuela, gun control advocates, Latin American immigrants and other minions of Satan. More facile explanations, such as that present-day US Navy pilots are being recruited from the most systematically stupidised and deluded generation since the whiskey-bibbing Wisconsin witch-hunter himself, suffer the fatal flaw of being boorishly obvious and thereby render themselves unfit for the serious consideration of military intelligence.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home