The Father of Teeth
Text for today: Incisors lxvi-lxxix
Much earlier, or else considerably later, the Father of Teeth came upon a hospice, where prospective corpses were kept as comfortable as was consistent with their heirs' ability to keep up with the fees. By the side of each bed sat a compassionate member of staff, whose role it was to reassure the departing customer that their life had not been entirely in vain.
In the first and largest ward were the richest and most prestigious clients. Here the staff were hardly required, and indeed there was barely room for them among the various relatives and other business partners. Among their numerous privileges, the wealthiest clients were permitted to witness the moulding of their monuments in the best non-degradable plastic. The Father of Teeth passed through, sucking his gums loudly and eliciting much disapproval and the clandestine chuntering of half a dozen bodyguards.
The next ward was reserved for the hard-working and dutiful, who had sired or squeezed out large families to carry various milligrams of genetic code gloriously into the future. Here the relatives were equally numerous, standing about as if they themselves constituted some sort of justification for the lives and sufferings of those on the verge of oblivion. The Father of Teeth went up to one of these worthies and told him that, thanks to the sterling efforts of his dying grandmother, a degenerate ape-like thing a million years hence would bask in the privilege of hereditary flat feet; the grandson himself, however, would have no such memorial, as the flat-footed gene was carried only via the distaff. Distraught at the prospect of his grandmother's demise, the grandson called across one of the exit custodians and requested that the Father of Teeth be ejected from the premises.
The custodian laid hands upon the Father of Teeth and escorted him out through the largest ward of all, which contained those destined to be entirely forgotten by posterity: the poor, the modest and the excessively intelligent. Having no legacy to leave, these inmates were considered unworthy of the staff's attention, and were by and large left to die in peace; from which the Father of Teeth concluded that even those who do less than the usual amount of harm may occasionally gain a just reward.
Much earlier, or else considerably later, the Father of Teeth came upon a hospice, where prospective corpses were kept as comfortable as was consistent with their heirs' ability to keep up with the fees. By the side of each bed sat a compassionate member of staff, whose role it was to reassure the departing customer that their life had not been entirely in vain.
In the first and largest ward were the richest and most prestigious clients. Here the staff were hardly required, and indeed there was barely room for them among the various relatives and other business partners. Among their numerous privileges, the wealthiest clients were permitted to witness the moulding of their monuments in the best non-degradable plastic. The Father of Teeth passed through, sucking his gums loudly and eliciting much disapproval and the clandestine chuntering of half a dozen bodyguards.
The next ward was reserved for the hard-working and dutiful, who had sired or squeezed out large families to carry various milligrams of genetic code gloriously into the future. Here the relatives were equally numerous, standing about as if they themselves constituted some sort of justification for the lives and sufferings of those on the verge of oblivion. The Father of Teeth went up to one of these worthies and told him that, thanks to the sterling efforts of his dying grandmother, a degenerate ape-like thing a million years hence would bask in the privilege of hereditary flat feet; the grandson himself, however, would have no such memorial, as the flat-footed gene was carried only via the distaff. Distraught at the prospect of his grandmother's demise, the grandson called across one of the exit custodians and requested that the Father of Teeth be ejected from the premises.
The custodian laid hands upon the Father of Teeth and escorted him out through the largest ward of all, which contained those destined to be entirely forgotten by posterity: the poor, the modest and the excessively intelligent. Having no legacy to leave, these inmates were considered unworthy of the staff's attention, and were by and large left to die in peace; from which the Father of Teeth concluded that even those who do less than the usual amount of harm may occasionally gain a just reward.
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