Salve, O Popolo d'Eroi

Sniggers of triumph are undoubtedly resounding through the corridors of Whitehall today, as it appears that the beastly Euro-wogs have blinked first in the battle of opportunity to pull back control of Global Britannia's invisible chain. The Italian government has announced that, in the event of a clean-break Brexit, a bunch of migrants will be permitted to jump the queue, to the incalculable detriment of the enemy's moral and economic standing. This latest indiscretion by the beastly Euro-wogs cannot help but benefit the war effort on the mainland, where Her Majesty's Government continues so strong and stable that it regards a few dozen refugees in the Channel as a national emergency. Indeed, not only is the Recrudescent Imperium of Westminster, Gibraltar and the Falkland Islands forcing the invaders to pay for the privilege of remaining in their own homes; it also does not scruple to deport British citizens whenever the whim occurs. One feels almost sorry for the lesser breeds who hope to prevail against such valour, such decency, such stern and silent pride.