Small Change

If further proof were needed that austerity is at an end, grateful plebs need look no further than the Government's crusade against rogue landlords. Property owners who have been ruled unfit to let accommodation are still collecting rents, often at the taxpayer's expense, so it's easy to see why the Conservatives might have a soft spot for them; nevertheless, the Government has in the past couple of months set up a database to which, after some prompting, it condescended to allow tenants access. In all honesty, this was a pledge which even the dead-eyed warden could make in good conscience as, presumably thanks to Whitehall's famous level of aptitude with electrical computing machines, the database is empty anyway. This month, however, comes the red meat: local authorities are to be allocated a whopping two million pounds to ramp up action against the nation's ten and a half thousand rogue landlords. It works out to something less than £6000 per local authority, or £190.48 per landlord. Fortunately, many Conservative members and donors also happen to be landlords, so doubtless the compassionate and law-abiding majority will hasten to impose some form of additional voluntary regulation that will, as always, prove far more effective than any crypto-Stalinist interference from the nanny state.