Detention Time Again

Given that it consistently treats Her Majesty's loyal serfs as wayward schoolchildren in perpetual need of a thrashing, Her Majesty's Government can be remarkably dilatory about handing in its homework. The Ministry for Wogs, Frogs and Huns has been debating whether to hold an inquiry into British connivance with kidnap and torture antics during the late War on the Abstract Noun, and has followed up the lamentable performance of Master David Davis and his cronies by missing its own deadline for the decision. Since those with nothing to hide have nothing to fear, one possible explanation is that the Ministry has been recently efficientised by sacking half its staff and shredding some purely random files; nevertheless, a few mere experts are concerned that some of the fun and games may be actionable in the international criminal court. British officialdom has thus far been immunised from prosecution by the fact that the ICC has hitherto specialised largely in punishing Africans; but there seems little reason why the court should continue to exercise such a Home Office degree of restraint beyond next March, when Britain's economy officially crashes into the Third World.