Ditch the Architectural Crap

In a concerted effort to prove themselves as sentient and feeling as any ordinary, decent average £50,000-a-year Briton, the Conservatives have been marshalling their expenses claimants on social media. Their eyes have been opened by a presentation from special advisers, whose shiny new editions of Corporate Humanspeak for Dummies evidently advise the use of homely metaphor now that obscurantism is out and plain old lying is in. Not only are we to understand that the Conservatives have a strategy beyond the usual Murdoch-directed linguo-rectal orientation and rinse; but the strategy is to be visualised as "a house where the roof is Brexit and the economy, but the three key pillars underneath are schools, housing and the environment". Aside from the Stalinist council-hovel nature of the building - only three pillars, indeed! - it's fortunate that the Government had the foresight to get rid of all those nasty experts; otherwise someone might have been unkind enough to tell the spadlings that it's inadvisable to build a house from the roof down, especially when the contractors happen to be cowboys like Davis, Hammond and Werritty.