Cash Flow

Roll up, poor folk; your tonic take:
Doc Duncan Smith's best oil of snake!
It's wondrous simple, very new,
Solves everything, including you,
And furthermore, while saving cash,
It quiets children, settles hash,
Kills all known germs, and some as yet
Unknown to all but me, I'll bet.

And with a larger dose you'll see
The evidence supporting me!
Just swallow, feel those cramps with cheer
As nasty facts just disappear;
You have my word, it doesn't hurt
As favourable numbers squirt
And flow with nearly painless leak
From out the hole I use to speak.

But what's this? Did no-one write down
My warm statistics, soft and brown?
How dare the facts still fail to show
The virtues of my fragrant flow?
And now what's this? The cheek! The gall!
There's nothing coming out at all!
We've lost the numbers, and - oh hell,
I've lost my orifice as well!

Sir Godley Snatcher, MD (Genuine)