Some Jews are Israel's Misfortune

British academia has been redeemed from the scourge of antisemitism thanks to the intervention of a plucky little ambassador from the Middle East's much-oppressed nuclear-armed apartheid Righteous State. In a calculated insult to the true meaning of the Holocaust, a Jewish Holocaust survivor was due to give a talk at Manchester University, comparing Israeli ethnic cleansing to Nazi security measures. A disaster of Corbynite proportions was averted only when the plucky little ambassador and his civil affairs attaché visited the university's superbly-titled Head of Student Experience and made him a clarification he couldn't refuse. Appropriate action was taken, and the absurd comparison of vicious racist oppression with virtuous racist oppression was duly removed; though undoubtedly further vigilance will be required to prevent other Jewish Holocaust survivors falling prey to the scourge of autobiographical misinterpretation.