Clean Common Sense

Since those with nothing to hide have nothing to fear, it's only natural that the Government should choose to release its clean air plan, if plan is the word I want, on the day when the headlines are choked with local elections. Having been chivvied through the courts not once but several times, and having at last come to the regrettable realisation that the enemies of the people still wield a certain influence, the Government has knocked up a few proposals intended mainly to protect the same car manufacturers who were caught lying about their products' emissions some little time ago. Everything that is wrong with the country's air is due to a mess left by Labour; particularly, no doubt, the Imperial Haystack, who as Labour mayor of London presided over persistently illegal levels of pollution. The responsibility for cleaning up (without, of course, inconveniencing any actual polluters) rests entirely with local authorities, who must simply buckle down and deliver new and creative solutions while, in accordance with the dictates of common sense, the Secretary of State for Environment, Floods and Badger Apocalypse gets on with more important things.