Despite being nothing much to worry about as far as the Bullingdon Club was concerned, last winter's floods were among the most severe on record in Britain; but fortunately only according to mere experts. A review compares the flooding to that of March 1947, which had a larger impact because the country was recovering from war and had only rudimentary flood defences: a situation to which the Conservatives and their UKIP backbone are stil gamely trying to return us. One of the mere experts noted that the effects of the flooding were personal, even though they happened mostly to the idle and over-privileged inhabitants of the Northern Powerhouse. Also on the bright side, the difficulty of attributing any single specific event to climate change, or even to the Conservative Party's vandalism of flood defences, means that Government policy can proceed smoothly along its prole-fracking, badger-busting, topsoil-trashing way, while the drivelling clod Andrea Leadsom (remember her?) flails around the DEFRA stationery cupboard trying to find out where they've hidden her wellies.