Everyone Deserves A Second Chance

The Ministry for Profitable Incarceration has abandoned yet another of Chris Graybeing's innovations, which involved limiting the movements of offenders by attaching a white elephant to each miscreant's ankle. Instead of the proposed custom-built devices, tracking tags will now be off-the-peg, as befits Corbynite proledom, and will be rolled out "before the end of the parliament" or, in Oldspeak, whenever. Additionally, the Ministry will be allowing bids from those exceptionally honest people at G4S, who stiffed the taxpayer for nearly two hundred million over the monitoring of fictitious tags. This efficiency saving pleased the Conservatives so much that they were still throwing public money at the company a year later, despite the Home Secretary having almost no marital connection with G4S whatsoever.