Flame Out

Besides being the party of law and order that condones tax-dodging and enforces its will by extra-judicial assassination, the modern Conservative Party is also the party that respects national traditions by destroying them. One would think Bonfire Night - the burning in effigy of a mercenary religious terrorist, with lots of expensive full-colour explosions - might hold a special appeal for today's wog-bombing enthusiasts; but evidently the festival's commercial potential is insufficient to earn it the holiness of Chocolate Egg Week or the Ninety Days of Christmas. Nevertheless, at least one Conservative councillor in Birmingham is squealing because the local authority has failed to keep the event going through privatisation, as befits other British institutions such as libraries, the police and the NHS.