Constitutionally Incapable

Britain's Head Boy, who refused to attempt reform of the Lords and then crammed it with his own chums at the first opportunity, wants to re-jig the electoral system so that it's fairer to people like him. As a preliminary to this exercise in enfranchisement efficientisation, the Government wants to delete about two million unworthies and undeservings from the electoral register, and has now decided to do it a year early so that any elections which crop up next May will take place under a less iniquitous system than the one which has kept Britain's Head Boy in office. However, the Electoral Commission has flagrantly undermined British democracy by advising the House of Donors to block the Great Daveymander for now, apparently on the grounds that our thousand-year fudge is too fragile to withstand the whims of a few middle-aged schoolboys in a hurry. Of course, since the Electoral Commission has not yet been privatised, its conclusions are by definition flawed by red tape, human rights and Trotsko-Stakhanovite ideological bias.