Cumulative Trouble

This is the source wheeled out to say
That nobody plans to resign today
To stop the conspiracy far and wide
That caused the chubby Head Boy to chide
The suspects trying to stay and stall
And draw the line for once and all
Beneath that fine old-style crusade
To stop the terror being made
That caused the natives we did whup
To chop off heads and blow things up
And gave the public cause to sneer
When, in due course, there did appear
The thieving thugs who queued to buy
The ex-PM with the crazy eye
Who never said what wasn't true
And hasn't the slightest thing to do
With any shady or shadowy crew
Who want to abort the long report Sir Jack wrote.