The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Friday, March 20, 2015

Republican Party Reptile

Fury at continuing God denial horror

Creationists in North Carolina have been praising the divine sense of humour as another faith-testing prank was unearthed by palaeontologists.

Fossil evidence has been uncovered of a 9-foot terrestrial crocodile which walked through the Triassic on its hind legs. It is thought to be one of the most ferocious and primitive Republicans on record.

Members of creationist and Young Earth congregations could be heard into the small hours, chanting praise for Jesus and anti-palaeontologist slogans.

"This proves beyond all doubt that creatures essentially resembling Republicans walked the earth long before the so-called dinosaurs," said lay preacher and mobile home salesman Pollock Squalous in between hosannas.

"It throws a God-shaped spanner right into the whole Islamo-evolutionist hen-run, and there's places where the sun's gone out as well. Coincidence? I don't think so."

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