Blue and Red Together Make Purple

Someone with a foreign name has infiltrated Oxford University and is accusing the Government of lying in order to pander to racists. This will certainly be shocking news for those who believe that, whatever else the coalition may lie about, its commitment to wog-bashing remains sincere and absolute. Nevertheless, it appears that the mad old cat lady in the Home Office, whose meaningless and self-defeating targets on limiting net immigration have now been officially missed, may indeed have known all along that the Government's no-ifs-no-buts pledge to the UKIP vote was a bit if-and-but after all. Britain's Head Boy will be having a burble about the whole business soon, in which he is expected to blame the Euro-wogs for their lack of consideration in coming over here to help the economy grow. Britain's Head Boy will call for EU migrants to be punished for their misdeeds by forefeiting their tax credits; a policy which Rachel "Kick 'em Harder" Reeves, the shadow minister for workfare and privation, has already announced for the manifesto of Her Majesty's Loyal Opposition.